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Theology Thursdays: Reaping and Sowing The Fruits or Destruction of Your Life by Herndon L. Davis

I recently had a heart-to-heart conversation with someone who is currently living a life of regret and loneliness. He blames his life situation on his being gay and wishes he could do it all over again but this time as a heterosexual man.

Before I could interject my thoughts, he told me how he had spent the entire decade of the 80ís in the clubs when he should have been in college. The 90ís came and went and still no college, but the drugs, the clubbing, and the rampant sex continued.

Now nearly 50 years old heís wishing he wasnít gay. Gay is now the reason why he is lonely, without a partner and merely existing till death. To him all his problems would be solved if only he were straight. Heíd have a wife and kids and loneliness would be a thing of the past for him, or so he thinks.

Yet in a single breath he identified the true source of his regret and loneliness. It was himself. He is now reaping the life what he sowed in his past, and it has nothing to do with him being gay. Instead it has everything with how he approached Godís gift of sexual diversity in homosexuality.

Like many generations before him and after him, he could not get past the ďsexĒ of being a homosexual or the ďfunĒ of being gay through excessive clubbing and meaningless dating. In fact he enjoyed the sex and the clubs so much that he himself admitted that he squandered away his opportunity to go to college. Instead it was the drugs and the transient sex based relationships that were more of a concern to him.

Now heís past the midpoint of his life and sees the error of his former ways. Instead of accepting the blame and moving forward, he now blames his personhood, his diversity, he blames his homosexuality.

Unfortunately, there are too many people in our midst who feel similarly. Like many who came before and after him, this person was driven to the various vices (i.e. drug, alcohol, sexual addiction, excessive clubbing, etc) in order to medicate the emotional pain of homophobia and societal rejection, but he stayed there just a little bit too long.

We must all take an inventory of our lives and recognize that we can either reap the joy and fruits of our lives as proud gay/lesbian men and women or instead reap the destruction of our lives as regretful, angry individuals.

You see gay is not the enemy. It is our choices, decisions and approaches on how we live our lives as proud gay/lesbians thatís the enemy. Even if you fell victim to the vices of life, itís still not too late to start sowing a life of productivity, peace and joy!

Do not allow your insecurity, lack of faith, and downtrodden depressive spirit to drive you into thinking that you must remain this way for the rest of your life. Thereís a passage in the bible that states that the latter part of your life will be GREATER than your past.

If this is true, then this means that you still have the opportunity to reap fresh fruit, love, kindness, joy, happiness, and peace. But it all starts with your choices and decisions of now, your choices of today!

What changes in your life must you make now so that you may reap a greater tomorrow? Do you have to make a choice to change your environment, your friends, or your job? Or could it be your diva attitude or your diva outfit that no longer fits your much older body?

Whatever your new choices and approaches in your life, from this day forward do not ever allow anyone or any situation that is less than God to tell you that itís too late to clean up your life. Allow your creator to have the final word and judgment, and then prepare yourself to reap the fruits of your tomorrow!

Herndon L. Davis is an author, lecturer, and TV Host. He can be reached directly at

Herndon L. Davis

Thursday, January 19, 2006

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